Perusing e-bay in my off time...

Sometimes I'd rather cruise E-bay for cool mid-century modern stuff than watch TV. Sometimes when doing so I come across funny and weird stuff.

For instance, a saxophone being sold by a Chinese man (in Shang Hai). Now, the saxophone itself isn't exactly hilarious, but the description is another story (my comments are in red):

Hello dear friend, I'm glad to see you here. (how nice!) Now this time I will show you an exquisite and old treasure! (the saxophone is shiny, and looks to be pretty new) I am an antique collector, I have a dream to share the old Chinese and oriental cultures
(if you look in the history books, you will find that saxophone was the first "official instrument" of ancient China) with the people in all over the world. Our online shop on eBay will offer an even greater variety of Asian articles for you (like saxphones!). This is a Superexcellent exquisite silver saxophone. It is really a rare item and worth collecting!!! Please first look the photos, Its texture is very well. Although it has had a long history, But it is in good preservation, no crack and no chip. With the perfect style, wonderful workmanship, nice design, So wonderful item. please don't miss it ! It is most valued. I got this item from countryside (aparently, a roving blue's traveler wandering the Chinese hillside), If you won this item, It will bring good luck and blessedness for you, I believe you are a standout buyer (why thank you --even though you've never met me). If you know the value of my item. Please bid my item. You will not regret!!! I have many other wonderful items on my ebay, They are from different nation that have the centuries-old culture and history, You can view my other items. please do not miss so better chance to get it. Enjoying your bidding!!!

Shipping (just shipping) for the above item is $248 (what a bargain!).


Here's another item from the above seller:




I was thinking about getting these for playing guitar (...and "Temple of Doom-ing" any punk-ass-bitch heckling from the audience).

Finally, I am wondering where this guy got a hold of an actual alethiometer ("early geomantic omen mechanism clock" as he calls it):


I wonder if it tells the truth about his listings?

...I can't help but keep thinking about the old Chinese man in Gremlins...

Oh... one last thing:

you gotta love the internets

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