Friday, June 28, 2013

An Open Letter to Chapstick

Dear Chapstick,

If you are going to charge me close to $4 for a .15oz stick of petroleum, please spend some time and effort on a delivery mechanism which hasn’t changed in nearly 90 years.

Almost inevitably my Chapstick tubes end in a gooey, unusable mess when the wheel on the bottom of the stick turns in my pocket and the product gets all jammed up inside of the cap.

Are you telling me that in an age where we can talk to our friends in China on MOVIE PHONES you can’t make a tube of petroleum wax that doesn’t spooge all over the freaking place?

PUT A FREAKING LOCK ON THE TWISTY PART. The fix is only a click away.

Sincerely,

DB

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